Posted in USA News

Here We Come A -Wassaulting

Read more…

Read More
Posted in USA News

South Dakota Unveils New ‘Come Die Here’ Tourism Campaign

PIERRE, SD—In an effort to attract visitors to a state that is home to some of the worst Covid-19 infection rates in the world, South…

Read More
Posted in USA News

Introduction Of Giancarlo Esposito Suggests Main Character Now Totally Fucked

FONTANA, CA—In a momentous twist sources confirmed could only mean one thing, the introduction of Giancarlo Esposito into the television show Jared Brenot was viewing…

Read More
Posted in USA News

Alternate Price Of Book In Canadian Dollars Gives Man Little Window Into What Life Would Be Like If He Were Canadian

DETROIT—Offering the U.S. citizen a brief opportunity to vicariously experience a different nationality, the Canadian price printed on the back cover of a book gave…

Read More
Posted in USA News

Satan Offering Black Friday Deal To Trade Only 50% Of Soul For Lifetime Of Riches

NINTH CIRCLE, HELL—Claiming that untold wealth could be yours for the “low, low price of half your immortal essence,” Satan, the Great Tempter and Prince…

Read More
Posted in USA News

Annoying Coworker Keeps Sending After-Hours Emails That He’s Trapped In Office Elevator

SPARKS, MD—Growing increasingly irked by the inconsiderate behavior, employees at local advertising firm Valley Media were reportedly annoyed Friday that their coworker, Josh Goldberg, kept…

Read More
Posted in USA News

Pervert Gets 10 Yards Taken Off Of His Restraining Order For Good Behavior

Read more…

Read More
Posted in USA News

Nation’s Relatives Call For Little Zoom Tour Of Your Apartment

CARROLLTON, TX—Declaring “Ooh, yes” and “Let’s see,” the nation’s relatives reportedly called for a little Zoom tour of your apartment Thursday. “What fun, we’ve never…

Read More
Posted in USA News

How We’re Celebrating Thanksgiving In The Coronavirus Pandemic

Read more…

Read More
Posted in USA News

‘Addison, Say Hi!’ Announce Nation’s Aunts Momentarily Pointing Webcam On Surly 13-Year-Old Cousin

Read more…

Read More