Category: USA News
Latest USA News
Hospital Unveils New Delivery Taprooms For Bonding With Newborn Over Couple Beers
DENVER—Calling the first 48 hours of a child’s life a critical period of parental development, the University of Colorado Hospital Birth Center announced the opening…
‘I Don’t Love You Anymore And I’m Taking The Kids’ Talk Goes Surprisingly Well
AKRON, OH—Relieved by his measured and accepting reaction, local woman Megan Sjogren told reporters Friday that the “I don’t love you anymore and I’m taking…
Lies Men Will Tell To Get You To Sleep With Them
Unfortunately, men are pigs who will say just about anything to trick you into sleeping with them. Here are lies you should definitely watch out…
Queen Strips Prince Andrew Of Royal And Military Titles Amid Sexual Assault Lawsuit
Buckingham Palace announced that Prince Andrew has been stripped of his military titles and charities, a day after a judge ruled a sexual abuse civil…
PGA Golfer Hoping To Hit The Office If Round Finishes Early
HONOLULU—Wiping the sweat from his head as he studied a baffling putt angle on the eighth green, PGA golfer Grant Fahey told reporters Friday that…
The Onion’s Guide To Web3
Web3 is being called the future of the internet. But what is Web3, exactly? The Onion explains. Read more…
Wayfair Shopper Who Didn’t Read Dimensions Would Never Have Bought Sofa If She Knew It Was 300 Feet Tall
OLATHE, KS—Kicking herself for failing to read the product’s dimensions, local woman Annalisa Farrell told reporters Friday that she never would have bought her new…
‘Hero Rat’ Who Detected Landmines In Cambodia Dies In Retirement
Magawa, an African giant pouched rat in Cambodia who received a prestigious award for his life-saving duty finding dozens of landmines left over from a…
